Kill Two Birds and Get Stoned a simple approach to growing pot by Ratchet, AKA, and Edith

Before today's advanced growing techniques were around people used to just plant a seed, water it, harvest it, dry it and smoke it. Although by today's standards these methods may seem crude they are effective. Proof lies in the behavior of your mothers and fathers during the 60's and early 70's.

Those of you who asked a general question that probably showed you knew little if anything about growing were directed to the !! Newbie Resources !!. You were given great starting points to begin your education and told to lurk, read and seek. If you want to learn to grow consistently potent high yielding plants, this is exactly what you should do!

You say, with a slight whine "But I don't want to go through all that. I just want to plant the seed and grow the weed, like the hippies used to do."

I say, "This is for you, grass smoker. You can travel the same path as those who have grown before us, the ancient hippies. That path lies under the sun and in the dirt, and takes very little knowledge to find."

Eight Steps On The Path

Featuring the No LRS Method of Growing

Before we begin KNOW THIS:
Growing your own weed may seem harmless to some of you and you're right but People in power don't see it that way and growing your own is a serious risk that could land you in jail for a very long time. There are many security issues that you should be aware of but will not be given in this short guide. For now, live and die by these 3 rules:

1. Tell no one
2. Show no one
3. Sell to no one

If you stick to these rules you should be OK unless you have an unlucky accident.

BEWARE! Although simple the 3 rules are not easy to live by it takes a strong will. The good news is if you don't have the will to follow the rules now after you get out of jail you will. Use this newsgroup to talk about a garden.

The following guide was written from the outline of the soon to be available book, "Kill Two Birds and Get Stoned". This book deals with the politics of prohibition, methods to end and details three systems for growing marijuana for medicinal purposes for the beginner. The authors and publishers of this book are not responsible for uses of this information for other than legitimate medicinal purposes. This is information and its dissemination is still legal.

Hey that goes for this guide too. And just for kicks add this; I hope you spread this info around. Print it, copy it and give it to everyone. Hell post it up on bulletin boards (the ones you can touch) put it anywhere and everywhere.

ratchet

Light-That which enables you to see
Air-That which enables you to breath
Soil-That which you walk on
Water-That which makes you wet

The simplest way to start is with natural sunlight. Grow your first plant with the light from a south facing window in a pot filled with soil. Don't put the plant on the window sill for obvious reasons. (For those who burned before reading and the reason isn't obvious refer to security rule #2.) If you can't put the plant in the sun without being seen you will have to use artificial light or plant outside. Since you do not want to read a lot of material you'll have to find inf. on growing with artificial light elsewhere because it's not here, for now. Planting outside in the ground for a first time grower with little experience is not recommended although if you must , you must. Fret Not! A short explanation of artificial lighting, enough to get you started, will be added to this guide in about a month.

Step #1 Gather your Supplies

Step #2 Selecting the Seed

Try to get your first seeds from a bag that smells skunky, has tight buds, and makes you want to sink into the couch and watch TV when you get high. If you can find this it should be suitable. You could buy seeds but since you are just experimenting you shouldn't. Seeds should be brown or gray, not white or green.

Step #3 Germinating the Seed

Step #4 Planting the Seed

"Keep your dirty hands off the seed, use the tweezers!" Thought you got caught, huh.

Cover the seed with soil and water lightly to help the seed settle. Plant 4 or 5 seeds per pot so you will have at least one female in every pot. Cover the pot with saran wrap, this will create a mini greenhouse to help the new sprouts. The top layer of soil must stay moist for your seeds to sprout. Keep it moist by checking from time to time to see that it didn't dry out and spraying the surface with water from your new spray bottle if it is. Use enough water to reach the seeds. When you see your first sprout in 1 to 7 days take the saran wrap of the pot. By the way, the pots should be anywhere from 1 to 5 gallons. The bigger the plant the bigger the pot.

Step #5 Grow the Plant

When it's time to feed use a fertilizer with equal amounts of nutrients.

"Oh no here comes the part I didn't want to hear, nutrientsoh man.."

Chill it's easy. On the fertilizer package there will be three letters, NPK, (yeah just like the guy in the newsgroup), along with the letters will be numbers. You want the numbers to be all the same or close. Peters' 20-20-20 is great. Follow the instructions on the package for mixing and water as usual, which is around the stem not on it.

"But when do I water and when do I feed. I'm no farmer what the.."

Easy now. To find out how much water your pot will hold pay attention to how much you use the first time you water which will be when the soil 3" down feels dry. No tool use your finger. From now on water with > that amount every time you water with or without fertilizer.

Fertilize if the plants don't look healthy, if the leaves aren't green. Don't over fertilize, treat them like a house plant or a dog feed them when they need to be fed. Water your plants when the soil about 2-3" down dries out. Best to underwater! If your not sure don't water until your plant begins to wilt (droop) then water it and watch it stiffen up just like a........ Pay attention to how many days it took for the plant to start wilting and use that as the base for your watering schedule. Keep in mind that as the plants grow they will need more water.

Step #6 Flower the Plant

A Message from AKA: "Other weird things can happen too. Some of the pot that causes young males to grow titties after smoking was produced because of crazy interruptions in the dark cycle." (Please see PS at end of guide)

Look for flowers where the stem of the leaves meet the main stem. If you see two white, pink or cream color hairs your the proud parent of a girl. If the flower looks like a cluster of balls it's a male. This is for the hardcore feminist out there----KILL ALL THE MALES. Males will give you seeds and you want sinsemelia, seedless weed, don't you.

Gradually the few flowers will become many and begin to swell. You will see shiny glands growing on the newly forming bud, these hold the resin that gets you high or makes you well. When 50 to 70% of the white hairs have dried up and changed color to red or orange it's time to harvest.

Step #7 Harvest and Dry

Cut all your buds off leaving enough branch to hang your plants upside down with. Trim off all the big fan leaves by cutting them from the stem they are growing from. You have 2 choices: now you can trim off the smaller leaves now or get them off after they are dry. Try them both and decide for yourself.

"Hey don't do that." Don't chuck the trim it's pretty good smoke and if you have the killer it can be better than many bags you paid good money for. You know what while your fooling around with leaf why don't you donate those fan leaves to your local non-profit medical marijuana supplier. Cannabutter for cooking can be made with the leaves. Hey if your scared (which you should be) donate anonymously.

Hang your plants by the clothespins on the string running across the top of the inside of the drying box. That's the one you made for drying with no instructions from me. A small fan on the bottom of the box will help dry them evenly. Again you want room temperature and the reason their in the box is to keep them in the dark. (You don't want them to know everything.) Keep this in mind while building your box. Light degrades THC. You don't have to use a box any dark spot will do with the right temp and humidity

Step #8 Smoke it

IMPORTANT POINTS
-Do not over water
-Do not over fertilize
-Give 12 hours of continuous hours of darkens to cause flowering
-Follow the 3 security rules like your life depends on it because it does!

KNOW THIS
There is no garantee of success with the limited knowledge this guide provides. you will not be able to correct any of the problems that can show up--- you will have to learn much more for that. You are at the mercy of the gods when you can't problem solve. On the other side, your chances for success are greatly increased if your starting from total or near total ignorance of growing methods. General house plant or garden knowledge helps a lot too, the more the better.

These are the basics. If you follow them you can grow your own, remember it's just a weed. Most growers started slow and simple like this and learned more as they found they enjoyed growing the plant as much as smoking it.

"My hope is that you will follow the same path grass smoker."

More growers = better chance to legalize. So have fun with your experiment and I hope you become a permanent member of the growing movement to grow your own.

Peace and Stay free
Ratchet

P.S. Smoking weed never caused anyone to grow breasts, male or female.

A Message from AKA: "Make em' catch us all."